**WARNING: Read at your own discretion. This blog post may contain juvenile cleansing jokes, as well as a brief controversial use of emoticons**
Yup, that's right everyone! It's that time again!
Our weekly update. After last week's overwhelming response and positive feedback that has been coming in from Twitter, Facebook and the 70 year old somethings on NetZero accounts, this blog has quickly made its way into the top 100 blogs about Mormon families utilizing competitive tactics and swindling strategies to improve their body composition. Yes, everyone. We've cracked the Top 100 and are up to 130 page views in two weeks. Granted, 85% of those views come from myself, but hey, nobody needs to know that.
So week 2! Wow, don't let the "Play on Words" title throw you off. Amy, you know I had you going. Especially after your comment during the kickoff about sending photo proof of the Fat Flush (NOT APPROPRIATE!)
This past week everyone should have started on the cleanse for the month. We all should have been regulated and feeling loose all week long. What better way to show your love during Valentines week then by cleaning out your system for your significant other?
I know that Nicole and I chose to celebrate our love by frequenting the facilities on St. Valentine's Day.
Anyways, strangely enough, a lot of you sent me visual proof of your success with the cleanse. Some of you (Coach, Deb) had struggles at first at "sweeping the chimney", but I think Mike and I may have found the solution:
Coach tried to cleanse using a strict diet of Fudgecicles and Otter Pops; but, unfortunately, in a shocking scientific pheonmenon, he only cleansed out a small child!
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Snowman Pants and all, Coach is making the pounds fall |
Deb also was unsuccessful at first, as she couldn't get the cleanse to work the first few days; but, thanks to the Rocky Mountain Biscuit Waltz that Scout taught her, Mama Deb is was as regular as a Viking by week's end.
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"Come on Grandma, you need to scrunch your face up like this and just let it ride!" |
Mike resorted to drastic measures to helping Ali cleanse....
Scaring the *insert your favorite bleep here* %&*@ out of her! :) (p.s. I warned you not to read if you are offended by cleansing jokes and controversial emoticons)
Now, then, as everyone was struggling to clean out their systems, Mike and I took matters into our own hands. We conducted numerous underwater tests in a local swimming hole and found the solution: Submerge your rump in water for 15 minutes, set it, and forget it!
Mike and I did, and now Deer Creek is full of new sea monsters:
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As you can see by our faces, it may have been a bit of struggle, but our colons are now clean as a whistle. |
After hearing how successful Mike and I were at cleansing by submerging our rumps in water, Amy tried out the method herself:
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Based on the amount of bubbles in the water.... Amy's cleanse was a clear (well, sort of) success |
Now, in all honesty, I hope the cleanse went well for you all. We'll get another round of the cleanse beverage next month to use. So start prepping now.
Mike B. was not able to cleanse with us this past week as he is on a strict diet of Haggis and Human Growth Hormone for his upcoming participation in the Westerland Highland Games. So we'll give him a pass on the Cleanse this time around.
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After suffering a horrendous eye injury in last year's games, Mike is hoping his new found "Stunner Shades" will help him avenge last year's Caber Toss Loss |
Now then, with all the jokes and hullaballoo aside, let's get to our results and progress after Week 2!
As of tonight (which it's 12:30 a.m. on Thursday), our family as a whole has:
Lost 41 pounds of body fat (about 4 pounds per person)!
This is a great number everyone! Keep in mind, if you are feeling discouraged or like you are not progressing, that is completely wrong. You are progressing and doing a great job. It's all about making a lifestyle change and creating healthy habits. The numbers will come. Plus, you'd be surprised if you measured your waist, arms, legs etc. and saw the improvement. Not to mention, I guarantee that the body fat % on everyone has gone down since the intial weigh in.
(In fact, I'm so confident this is the case, that if it's not, I will gladly grant anyone free babysitting on a day of their choosing...
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I promise to give your kids more attention than this guy. |
B, Coach & Deb, Nicole, you get the shaft on this one. And no Mike, don't go and eat your weight in In N Out Burgers just to score a free night of babysitting.)
We had some great progress from peeps this week:
Nate the GR8 and last week's Weekly Winner dropped another 5 pounds this past week!
(That puts Nate's total pounds loss at 10 so far)
Mama Deb saw some huge progress by dropping another 4 pounds
(She has lost a total of 9 pounds altogether)
Coach, after a slight gain of 2 pounds the first week, dropped 4 pounds this week as well! Coach and Deb have something good working for them. Share the secrets y'all!
Angie dropped another pound this week and has gone down a total of 6 pounds!
I don't like to brag, but yours truly dropped a solid 4.5 pounds of body fat this week as well :)
Nicole is tearing it up with her workout regimen. She is hitting the gym 3-4 times per week and toning up those obliques. MMM I love me some Nicole obliques.
B, I would brag about you, but you don't submit your numbers.... still waiting :)
Everyone else was solid too :)
Now for the weekly winner.
This one is tough, we had some great progress and some top point scorers. But I feel this Weekly Award, which by the way is really going to tickle your tastebuds, is more than deserving.
For the first time in the history of the Family FIT Challenge, We have a Winning Couple.
Without further adieu, your Sunbelt Dried Raisin Snacks Cleansers of the Week:
COACH AND DEB MATHEWSON! They have stepped up their game with their exercise regimen, dropped a total of 8 pounds together and are looking to bounce back after slow starts in week 1!
For their efforts they'll receive a 1.5 liter bottle (yes it really is 1.5 liters) of:
Vanilla Mint Antibacterial Listerine! Because, staying FIT in your mouth, is just as important as staying FIT down South!
Stay FIT Y'all